30-Day Devotional for Loki: Day 24

Question: What is a time that Loki has helped you? 

A few months back, there was a lot of unrest in the online Lokean community. People kept quitting Loki’s Wyrdlings and going to other groups and/or forming their own out of the frustrations they felt. There were a lot of admins who stepped down or quit because they felt Loki’s Wyrdlings was either not a serious enough space or there were too many people who embraced Marvel Loki as an aspect of Loki. I respected their decisions because people come in and out of communities fairly regularly; things change.

That doesn’t mean I found it an easy transition. I had to look for five people who I felt would be able to feel the shoes of the people who had left, at least in terms of the role they had played. That wasn’t an easy job, and the group isn’t perfect today (perfection is over-rated) but it is stable, functioning well, and it continues to attract new Lokeans. The group is the cornerstone of the work Loki asked me to do for him, so it is a relief to me that it is functioning again in a way that makes me feel glad to be part of it.

Because during the transition, I didn’t find it easy. It was one of the hardest challenges of my life to stay committed to the group and not walk away, throw my hands up in frustration, and just give up. I started to resent the group, and I hated myself for resenting something I had helped build – especially when it is something that I helped build out of my devotion to Loki. It felt an awful like I was resenting him, and I hated the way that felt because I didn’t want to resent him.

I didn’t know what else to do, so I turned to a friend who is capable of horsing Loki and asked him if he would talk to Loki and see if he would be willing to do that and talk through my friend and help me figure out where to go and what to do with the Loki’s Wyrdlings group. My friend had that conversation, and Loki agreed to horse him, and we had a face-to-face conversation.

*Note: I do not recommend doing this without training. Horsing a god is a very powerful, very dangerous technique, and you need very high levels of training to do this at all.* 

In that conversation, I told Loki everything that was on my mind regarding the group and the way that I was feeling about it. He never got upset with me, and he carefully considered everything I said. He essentially told me that groups change, people leave, and that the people who were meant to be in the group would find their way there. He also told me he never intended the group to be able to hold all of his devotees, as we are all vastly different. He explained to me that people see different faces of the gods, and different people are able to handle more faces than others (some less).

The depth of his kindness never fails to amaze me. Because even as I was telling him about the resentment the rapid changes in the group were causing me, he was telling me to find another focus for a while and to let the group take care of itself. There was never any indication I should desert the group or give up on – just take a step back and let the situation handle itself.

It was, in a way, an important lesson in understanding how liminality flows. Change happens, regardless of what we do, and we can flow with it or we can try to prevent it. Change, however, cannot be stopped, so trying to “fix” something doesn’t work – it just brings resentment. Letting change work its own way through the world, however, lets new life grow and gives rise to wonders.

Loki helped me see things in a new way, and that is a gift I will always treasure. He showed me how to step back enough to let change take its course, and then step forward again when things stabilize. The Loki’s Wyrdlings of today is vastly different from the Wyrdlings of three years ago, but it is still a vibrant, thriving Lokean community. All thanks to Loki.

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